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Maybe she deleted the app—or maybe, in a karmic twist that was almost too perfect, I'd just been I thought about how easy it is to pop out of an i Phone and back into the real world, to flicker back and forth from 2D to 3D and back again. I wondered if nowadays, with an endless stream of people to be right-swiped into your life, you would notice the guy on the yearbook staff who drives you to a meeting on a snowy day—or would you be in the passenger seat, swiping through pictures of thirsty dudes you don't even know?
I wondered who you might miss seeing if you were always looking.
She's 30, has a real, actual pulse, and has never been on Tinder in her life.
(We met in person and then reconnected via Twitter DM, a romantic device my mom is definitely not yet familiar with.) We don't live in the same place, and we aren't dating, though we try to see each other when we can.
"You could get a lot of sexually transmitted diseases," she'd said over the phone, swiping through a carousel of pouty female twenty-somethings.
The restaurant was crowded and humming with the auditory heartbeat of a Friday night in New York.
More than being with someone, Tinder creates the illusion of not being without anybody, a way to remember that there are indeed a lot of fish in the sea, and a great number of these fish might want to have sex with you. First, she said, ' Molly.' Anyway, I don't know what else to say to these people. I was, however, shocked that she’d been so forward, that it had worked (!! She said, unprompted, “You should wear condoms.” Did she think I was having a lot of sex—or none at all? Something you have in common that you interact with them on a regular basis and then you can kind of see, ' Do I like them? ' Rather than: Oh, I'm presented with this picture and I liked this picture. In a way, she and I were communicating more than ever. After an extensive conversation on Tinder, my mom asked a brunette named Anna if she'd like to get a drink.
And if my mom is so intent on my having a girlfriend, then why shouldn't she just go out and find one for me? At dinner in Manhattan one night, I set up Tinder on her phone, showed her how to operate it, did some right-swiping (even got a match! I changed the subject.*After I sent her this story, my mom wrote back: “I feel certain we discussed condoms in high school and college... ” Worth noting that “I feel certain” is not the same as “I am certain.” I didn’t know what was most unsettling about these messages—the spam (“which I think were prostitutes looking for business,” she told me); the fact that she thought “aspiring writer” was a good way to market me as an enticing match (she had to reassure one girl, saying, “But I do have a steady job at a magazine right now”); or her enthusiasm about finding a “good contact in case of job loss! She said yes, and so my mom sent her my phone number.
I think you should get to know people."I'm 26 and single. When she was 26, my mom was married to her high school sweetheart, the man who took her to the prom in a goofy Volkswagen Beetle. That baby was my brother, who at 26 had already been with the woman he would marry for six years. She would call me as I was racing back, only to say, “You shouldn’t be talking on the phone while driving! Like most parents, she was on the receiving end of much teenage vitriol and almost none of the deserved gratitude.
But unlike when my mom was 26, there is now, quite literally, an app for this. My mom is 58, has short hair, stands a tiny five-foot-two, and takes no shit. That started to change when I went off to college and, with some perspective, realized I was stupid and she was smart; when I realized that all she cares about is ensuring that her children don’t fuck up too terribly, and that, since “playing N64 at Dan’s house” really means “stealing all of Dan’s dad’s beer,” sometimes it’s okay to say no—even if your moody teen thinks you’re a fascist. '"'s takedown piece about Tinder and today's hook-up culture, in which appears this appalling, almost-too-perfect-to-be-believable quote: "' It's like ordering Seamless,' says Dan, the investment banker, referring to the online food-delivery service.